The Phil Naessens Show

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Thank You God for Sending us Sexy Jesus!!

Posted by pnaessensshow on October 14, 2012 at 1:40 PM


It’s a dark and dreary Sunday and like most Sunday’s I attempt to plan the opening to Monday’s Phil Naessens Show. Lately that usually involves the miscues of the New York Jets and the growing disdain for starting Quarterback (QB) Mark Sanchez and him being replaced by backup QB Tim Tebow, who I like to refer to as “Sexy Jesus”. Since I’m seven hours ahead of New York I don’t really know what will happen but I still like to be ready.


Anyhow, while I’m thinking about the drama in New York and how I can mock the whole thing I remembered something someone spammed my Facebook wall with a while back….it went something like this;


The reason the New York Jets suck is because God is mad that Tim Tebow isn’t the starting QB.


Sure enough, I’d been spammed by a militant online Christian but let’s unpack this statement from the land of the empty headed.


I don’t suppose that this Mensa member even thought for a second the reason the Jets hadn’t been winning had anything whatsoever to do with the reality that the Jets offensive line doesn’t block very well, the wide receivers have a difficult time catching balls thrown directly at them or the very real fact the Jets have extreme difficulty running the football (that would INCLUDE Sexy Jesus)….


Furthermore this fine example from the school of thought, reason and logic probably never even gave a thought to the fact that the Jets much ballyhooed defense can’t stop their opponents running game to save their lives has had anything to do with their losses either….


None of those very REAL facts had anything whatsoever to do with why the New York Jets are 2-3……..it has to be;


God is punishing the New York Jets for not starting Tim Tebow.


Let’s assume that my spammer is correct and God really is punishing the Jets for not starting one of His “boys”….


Does this mean that God is punishing us Jets fans who are forced to watch our beloved football team play beneath their capabilities each and every week?


Does this mean that God is punishing Head Coach Rex Ryan and his staff as there is a very real possibility that all of them will find themselves looking for work elsewhere unless they find a way to get this team back on track?


You’d think God would find better uses of His time than to pick on the Jets, wouldn’t you?


All it would really take to defeat that logic is for the Jets to win one game this season and the last time I checked the Jets have one not only one but TWO games!


I see your stupidity and raise you some logic!


Not to be outdone another member from the Tebow for QB militia messaged me with the following;


God is going to strike you dead for mocking His Son.


When I wrote back asking what this devout follower of Sexy Jesus thought of the GQ Magazine spread featuring a partially naked Tebow posing as if he were on a cross (the reason for the mockery in the first place) my new friend failed to respond…unless banning me was a response than I stand corrected!


Seriously folks; Tim Tebow is a great human being. By all accounts he is what he claims to be and that makes him aces in my book. He’s also a very good football player but as a QB he couldn’t hit a bull in the arse with a handful of rice and in my book that means he’s a terrible QB and should NEVER be a starting QB for the New York Jets. If saying that means that God is going to strike me dead than I’ll be joined by a LONG list of far more knowledgeable people than I am who are saying the very same things if not worse.


Furthermore; God isn’t punishing the New York Jets for not starting Sexy Jesus at QB. The Jets are punishing themselves by not playing very good football on both sides of the ball. Sexy Jesus has barely made an impact on the New York Jets except for jersey sales and other memorabilia and of course giving guys like me opportunities to pay our bills by giving us something to talk about each and every day on our radio shows, newspaper columns and TV shows….if that’s God’s punishment than all I have to say is;


Thank You God for sending us Sexy Jesus!!!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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